I'm Completely Over Kale, and Here's Why

Dear Kale,

There are a few things we need to discuss about our relationship. While I would like to say it's more about me than you, I do believe your fame as the "it" superfood of the moment (or the year, or the decade) might just have something with the rift in our relationship. You are a bit overexposed right now. You have made your way onto almost every menu (hello Chick-fil-A kale quinoa bowl), and every meal, including snacks — from juice to chips. You are everywhere and you are always an option. Could it be that I am bored of you?

But that isn't really my personal beef with you. It's the chewing. It takes me well over an hour to eat a salad with a leafy-green base of kale. I simply get tired of chewing, and chewing, and chewing. Often before I have finished my salad, I find myself putting the greens into the compost bin so they, being the nutritional powerhouses they are, can nourish other plants later. Some might say this a great weight-loss technique, but although I am sick of eating said kale salad, I am not particularly sated physically or emotionally. Yes, you can massage the kale to make it soft, but more often than not I find it served only slightly dressed. And this presentation makes it all the more unappealing to me.

Kale, I know you have superfood status, and are loaded with vitamins, minerals, and antioxidants, but there are a lot of other greens that contain more nutrients than you — I'm looking at you, romaine. These other greens are ones I truly enjoy, like peppery watercress and colorful chard. And while I was never at risk for overdosing on you, the concern of heavy metals in kale lingers (and provides a great excuse to skip it).

I am not going to turn my back on you completely, so it's not OVER over. But I am going to keep my distance and keep my options open.

Sincerely,

One Healthy Eater Perusing the Salad Bar